It’s official. I’m a bonehead. A goof. A goon of sorts.
maybe hopefully I’m just like every other mom or parent who tries to juggle what feels like 100 different things at once- sometimes I make a mistake, or two or three. Remember what happened when I tried to go bathing suit shopping with Lillian and ended up running around Nordstrom’s in a bikini or when I yelled firmly spoke to my dry cleaner for giving me my own husband’s suit (“That’s NOT my suit! I have never seen it before in my life!!“)? Ahhh memories.
Well I did it again. Another day of adulthood. Another mistake made. Another lesson learned.
Allow me to explain….
Every day of my adult life is opportunity to practice juggling various tasks: getting Lillian to/from school on time, have 1 on 1 time with Lillian, prepare healthy meals, pay the bills (or rather, dealing with incorrect bills from the pediatric dentist- grumble grumble), work, run, blog, and duel with the bottomless black hole that is the laundry basket.
Just when I start to feel like I’ve got the balancing act down pat something wild happens that stops me in my tracks and forces me to reevaluate my choices.
I had the day off of work and only had a few things on my daily “to-do” list. I had a 9 miler planned for the morning, a doctor’s appointment scheduled for 11 am and Lillian’s parent-teacher conference at 4 pm. By the time the doctor’s appointment was over I had from 12:30 pm to 3:30 pm to eat lunch, clean around the house (laundry included), blog a little and rest. It should have been more than enough time!
At 3:30 pm I was still still running around the house packing a bag to take Lillian swimming after the meeting. I thought to myself, Bathing suit- check. Extra towels and clothes- check. I’m good to go. Wait- no… hmmm. What was it that I needed to do? I couldn’t put my finger on it, but I knew I was forgetting to do something that afternoon, something that Owen asked me to do.
That’s it!! I have to get the damn dry-cleaning!! Earlier that morning Owen asked- for what may have been the 3rd day in a row if I could pick up the dry cleaning. He mentioned something about the “horror” of how he had been wearing suit pants to work. Oh no!!! Not suit pants!! I still don’t understand the difference between regular work pants and suit pants. They’re all pants, right?!? Pants are pants. Conversation closed. regardless, the man had asked three times. I better get the damn dry cleaning.
As usual I was running late. I don’t know if I have ever gone into the dry cleaners and hadn’t been running late. Yes, it’s me again- Mrs. Berry- the crazed wife who is walking around in 20 degree weather with wet hair and only one jean pant leg shoved into her Ugg. I am well aware that I don’t have my shit together-ever- it is one of my less endearing qualities. Just take the ticket and get me my non-suit-pant-pants, pronto please.
I pulled into the parking lot at the Y at 4:06 (6 minutes late to Lillian’s 15 minute conference) feeling like a pretty cruddy mom. Why can’t I just be on-time for once? Why do I push everything to it’s absolute limit? Why am I always rushing?
I parked the car and ran around to the passenger’s side to grab the swimming clothes off of the front seat. I hurriedly opened the passenger door while simultaneously reaching my way into grab the bag when- BAM!!! I thwacked myself HARD in the forehead with the car door. Did I really just hit myself in the head with the car door?!?! Son of a!!! That REALLY hurt! I opened the car door fully, glanced at the mirror to reveal that I had cut myself and was beginning to bleed fairly heavily. Well this is winning. Now I’m the crazy running mom who is always late who shows up with a gushing head wound to parent-teacher conference. Yep, definitely mom of the year. Cripes. Stupid non-suit-pant-pants!!
With a swim towel on the wound I marched myself towards Lillian’s school: I had a parent-teacher conference to attend and a little girl who was eager to go swimming that night. There I met up with Owen and Lillian’s teacher. The administration called two first-aid certified members of the YMCA’s aquatics department to treat my wound and assess if stitches would be needed. During this time I attempted to explained myself.
I was late because of the non-suit-pant-pants. And the laundry. And the traffic. And….
The reality is that I cram way too much into my day and I’m always rushing. I’m sick of rushing. I’m sick of being the mom who is always 5 minutes late. The employee who shows up at the last possible minute. The wife who say’s she’ll leave for her run at 8 am on Saturday but can’t get her bum out of the door until 8:15.
Time for a change
I strive to be more reliable and consistent with the people in my life. And that starts now. No more crazy rushing. No more gushing head wounds. Here are the first few changes that I will make to start smoothing things out in my life:
1. Just say NO! Sometimes I will have to say “No” to people, nights out and events that I want to attend to prevent over-scheduling myself. There are only so many hours in day and I need to prioritize what is important right now: family, work and health (running). *Last year I was on the committee to organize a YMCA fundraising event, the Taste of the South Shore. This year I sadly don’t have time to participate in the same capacity :(. This makes me sad, but will make the next few months a lot smoother.
2. Less is more. There is always laundry to be done, dry cleaning to pick up and another dinner to be cooked. Sometimes it will simply have to wait until later. This is where I truly need to improve. I hate leaving tasks half-completed.
3. Get organized! One day the husband and I took four hours (a car ride back from NJ) to discuss and plot out all of our travel, my races and several important events for the next 12 months. Having our travel planned and my days off from work organized is a huge relief.
4. Create long-term goals. Rome wasn’t built in day, right. Sometimes I get frustrated that I am a licensed mental health clinician working a retail gig. Honestly, most of the time I feel lost, but I’m working on that. About 6 months ago I plotted out my career goals for the next 2 years (broken up into 6 month increments). I’m happy to report that I finally feel like I’m making progress!!
Here’s to striving to be better. To make small changes with big improvements. To no more rushing. To no more gushing head wounds.
Never Stop Running,
The Lone Runner